The last two nights he has overflowed with tears over his suffering...that he was too busy to notice earlier, but now he is in bed, and everything is still and quiet-he remembers how bad he feels. Tonight I was trying to give him his nebulizer treatment (asthma medicine) and with the tears overflowing, and the nose running...it just wasn't happening.
In the midst of trying to get him settled and medicated, Demi asked me in a pleading, mom-you-steered-me-wrong, voice..."Mommy, I prayed and asked and asked God to make me better, and He didn't." (Demi used to be really into wishes, cataloging and pondering what kind of wishes had what kind of granting power, but this year he has moved up into prayer-big time)
I talked to my Son about God always hearing us and answering our prayers, but to remember that He is God, and He has a perfect will for us, and sometimes what we want isn't what God wants for us. I told him that maybe God would like you to learn how to have a happy heart even when you feel really yukky and sick. Maybe God wants you to learn to be brave so you will grow up a strong, brave and true man. Maybe if you didn't have to be brave, right this minute when you feel so sick, your courage muscles wouldn't grow strong as they need to be when you are big.
He pondered this and grew quiet, but then told me "At grandpa's party, a man said that God just gave up... maybe God gave up on my prayer." He was speaking of his grandpa's memorial service, it took me a moment to realize what he was talking about. I instantly told him, "God never fails, never gives up, He is always strong and able and willing to do so much more than we can imagine. God's answer for you right now is for you to be sick, and to learn to trust him and to be brave."
I left the room for a moment, and when I came back, Sky was tucking him in. I walked in, just in time to hear Demi say-"I'm still sick because God wants me to grow up to be a super hero."
So there you have it. I just love my boy.