an old-fashioned blog post

Hi-ya! So, I was just reflecting on blogging, old-school style and about some of the blogs I used to read way back in 2005/ 2006 before I started blogging.  Things were a bit simpler in those days, when blogging was really more of a web-journal.  Nowadays, we have so much going on; great site design, widgets, social media (micro-blogging!), linky parties, giveaways, photography....

I tend to get a little uptight about photos as art.  And then I don't post much, because I don't feel like getting on my big desktop computer in another room and editing photos.  Editing is kind of like work.

I decided to blog old-school tonight;

{Stuff}

a lot of messiness going on around here, as usual.  We had State testing for Amie this week, which involves some driving to and fro and waiting for her to be done, and waiting for "the call" that she is done so I can go fetch her.  Amie was very excited.  It's funny, for homeschooled kids- or at least for my kids, and my friends' kids; testing week is a social event.  They get to pack some good snacks, lunch, go to a new place that might have a cool playground (sometimes not) or might even have a pool they can swim in after (yes, this happened three different testing years- ultimate cool!)  and after the testing is done, or between times, like breaks- the kids can chat and play and invent interesting tag or hide & seek type games.  It is all very exciting.  Amie asked her dad to make sure to wake her at 6 a.m. so she would be all ready for the *big* day.  [sign in time was 9:30]

Our church had a big mens' conference and we had 3 of our old college boys (2 now married and 1 engaged!) fly in to stay at our house.  Very cool, and fun.  But didn't leave me a lot of time to do the things I should be doing like laundry and cleaning. My house is really a wreck.  I ended up cleaning the guest bathroom and the guest bedroom real good and calling it done.

Meg and Josie had big projects due last week.  Science fair projects and reports/ oral presentations for Biology and Chemistry class, and Josie had a big research paper due for Lit class, and Meg also had a presentation due for Economics.  (photos coming in a later post!)

The dreaded key assignments are due this week. {big sigh}  I'm calling "uncle" and it's official, for the younger kids we will no longer be using charter schools for high school.  St. Jenn's school for exceptional teens - here we come!

I have a learning record meeting this Thursday for the 3 oldest kids.  And then our heart-friends are flying in from Seattle for dinner.  They might be staying the night too, but I haven't confirmed.  This is my best-y Jennifer.  I don't know if she will be here long enough for a new episode of The Jennifer Club.  They are leaving the next day for a cruise.  They requested, with big excitement, dinner at Inn & Out burger.   Yeah, we are kind of spoiled, living in So. California.

Depression runs in my family, no, actually it gallops through the female line.  I have my turns with it.  This week I was hit with a wall of sadness/regret/panic as I realized my oldest dd is almost 18 and will no longer be homeschooling.  I had this horrible feeling of impending doom for those things left undone.  The subjects not delved into deeply enough.  We didn't do Bible as much as we should have.  I so regret this now.  I lay awake and tried to think of what we needed to cover in Bible and how to accomplish this before she starts college.  And then I knew I couldn't really, she is so busy right now with her studies and her life.  So then I was really sad and panicky.  I went to sleep telling myself "it's okay, I can get through this..." over and over.

I cried myself to sleep for two nights, and then...and then I snapped out of it and remembered that Sky always says that "things are never as bad as they seem or as good"  and I felt better. And I remembered that Meg isn't leaving for college, she will stay at home for two years and go to the community college first. [I'm not losing her yet]  And then I thought of Scarlett O'Hara and of the kick-butt truth that "tomorrow is another day"  and it was better.  Not perfect. But better.

So, no medication.  Yet.

I decided to think instead on all the wonderful things I admire about Meg.  She is super sweet and kind. Soft-spoken.  Quick-thinking and a deep thinker. She loves C.S. Lewis (and has read his non-fiction) and Tolkien.  She works hard.  She gets up early, like 5 a.m. most mornings and does her job of taking care of horses.  She does her school work independently and has become very dependable with completing her assignments  on her own.  She is still playing the violin and is now apprenticing with her teacher to become a violin teacher herself. She loves God and still goes to church meetings with us.

She is a daughter to be proud of.

Coming to the end of my homeschooling with her; I am extremely glad that we did it.  I am so glad I have had this time with her. My word of warning to you other homeschooling parents is that, yes- it goes by so very fast.  Blink and you miss it.  If I could do things differently, I would have planned more and worked harder to stick to those plans. I wouldn't have accepted days when we only got one or two things done, I would have made school hours less flexible.  I would have also ditched the charter school for high school.  The devotional/ discipleship relationship we had envisioned for the high school years got lost along the wayside of getting things done according to the charter school.  I regret that.

I am losing my rising 11th grader to the performing arts school next year, and possibly losing Demi for that school also in two years. Thinking about it makes me sad and a bit frantic about all the great learning I want to stuff into them before they go. And I feel sad, and a bit panicky and start my mantra again.

And then I stop, and think- "there is always the Summer and I will have them 2 whole months then"  ~oh yes, my pretties, I will have you all to myself then, and once a homeschool mom, always a homeschool mom.  I foresee Latin and an intense Bible school each Summer.

It'll be the Summer of love.

;)